As the weekend approaches and I look back on the past week, it’s easy to see where I fell short.
This week, there wasn’t any exercise.
There wasn’t any grappling.
There was chocolate, wine, one lemon bar and shortbread cookies.
There wasn’t any meditative quiet time.
There were no morning pages written.
There was a lot of going to bed and waking up late.
This week there were five days of homeschool. (We usually shoot for 4 days/week).
There was frustration during the math lesson and me catching myself on time.
There was a kiss on a sweet cheek and a comforted child on my lap.
There was a worksheet finished in good spirits instead of tears.
This week, there were many meals cooked from scratch- more than the week before.
There was split pea soup.
There was yellow lentil curry.
There were bean and cheese quesadillas with caramelized onions.
There was a beautiful mixed veggie omelette.
This week, there was work done in our freshly organized office.
There was a brand new computer delivered.
There was a much awaited Facebook business page.
There were orders packaged and sent and e-mails replied to.
There was lots of paperwork shredded.
There were calls unanswered by the tax office.
There was a mortgage refinance scheduled.
There were some checks deposited and lots of bills paid.
This week, there was a husband dropped off at the surgery center for his monthly procedure.
There was a last minute lunch date with a friend.
There was Wednesday as my mommy day off.
There was browsing the used book shelves at the local library.
There was a new stack of borrowed picture books to take home to my daughter.
There were spanakopitas and greek salad for lunch.
There was a wonderful afternoon at the beach park. A comfy pillow in my new comfy beach chair.
There was the shade of beautiful trees.
There was strong wind that delighted the kite surfers.
There were foamy turquoise waves, courtesy of two storms heading our way.
(That’s when the lemon bar came out.)
This week, there was a book started and finished. Book #32 for 2016. (The opposite of Spoiled by Ron Lieber).
There was a case of pinworms (our daughter’s fourth this year) and me trying to hide it from my friend.
There was her finding out anyway and me feeling very ashamed of myself.
There were written apologies and gracious forgiveness.
There was learning once again that honesty is always the better way.
This week, there was hired help and a deep cleaned house.
There were dishes done every night.
This week, there was slamming the front door in anger and escaping with the car.
There was driving aimlessly around the neighborhood.
There were thoughts of buying a plane ticket for a far away destination or at the very least spending the night at a nearby hotel.
There was owning up to my misbehavior and feeling the healing power of the words I’m sorry.
There were hugs and embraces and even a hand massage.
This week, there was finding out that two of my essays were chosen for publication on PowerofMoms.com.
There was a happy six year old sleeping in our bed, her reward for a good week of school.
There was a playdate with the French people we recently met.
There was joining the co-op’s Science class.
There was learning that bad ice cream is not worth eating.
There was creamy chocolate gelato savored afterwards.
This week, there was balling our eyes out and laughing ourselves silly watching UP.
There was drinking hot cocoa and going to bed at 2 am.
There was a bit of rushing getting ready for Capoeira because I’d slept in.
There was preparing breakfast to go. Serendipitously, there was a neighbor delivering fresh out of the oven cornbread.
There was forgetting my purse and phone at home and driving back to pick them up.
There was trying not to rush even though we were late.
This week there was rain in Hawaii.
There was a sun eclipse in Reunion island.
There was a small cyst cut out from my husband’s back.
There were sheets washed and blood stains removed.
This week I did fall short many times. Ironically that’s what made me grow.
When my flaws had me act up, I showed the strength to get my act back together.
What the worst parts of me damaged, the best parts of me fixed.
There is no light if you don’t know darkness.
There is no warmth if you don’t know cold.
There is light and darkness, warmth and cold within me.
There is love and fear, joy and pain within me.
There is music and silence within me.
There is me within me.
…but glorious all the same.
This essay was written on 09/03/16. Next week’s essay is titled ” A letter to Tom Cruise”. Subscribe using the widget below and my posts will automatically come into your inbox when they are published. Thank you for reading.